CIVIL WARS

11.15.19
it s hard to be happy for her
claiming she’s met a piece
of her soul
pitty

you cant find a missing piece
when you don’t see your own reflection in the mirror

not knowing how to be alone
talking of souls
i could tell you about it
holding me in disbelief when i say

i’ve felt the way blood flows in anothers body
seeing myself in the reflection of their eyes
touching what is pure and holly and
beyond human recognition
returning to my body
dazed and humbled at my own insignificance and grandure
what a fierceness in love
beyond you, or her, or me, or him
it is us

as individuals, together, and apart.

it sadness me. she will never know.

CIVIL WARS

11.16.19
a radio stuck on re-peat
im a selfless lover
going out of my way with needles in my head
in throws of pain
to make
birthday woes come true

she says he’s loud
never observes

i think on the lists he keeps
surprised by apple cider forget-me-knotts
and the many things i tell her
which she willingly ignores.

CIVIL WARS

1.6.19
stark contrast
he gives me apple cider
vinegar to kill excess cold
spoonfuls of medicine and literature
his curiosity nourishing fires of what makes me more human

yes, i’ll spend nights with you in bed
discussing hops, and burdock
laughing at specific indications, giggles and bubbles of heartfelt hawthorn

she’s taxing
grudgingly sipping down juice
there’s no backbone here
nothing steady
“i’ll move mountains” she says
while sitting steady in her own plateau
slowly amputating the passions in me

this is how it looks –
he’s been alone in his happiness
not lonely
he took the time to fill each cell in his body with himself
what happens when a person knows themselves
they are open for others
encourage their passions and truths – our love is pure

she doesn’t know how to be alone – and will likely never learn
unwilling to look in the mirror
she’ll jump on the next bus to anywhere
and it’ll be good – at first
but every person craves to find their own truth
she wont find it in anyone
and – as is now, will start to inflict herself in others
drowning the life off those she claims to love

i wouldn’t brag about not staying on the market too long
not when the fruit you buy is rotten inside