DANCER
8.29.19
the clock ticking hours dipped in honey with you
the past increases
the future decreases
possibilities decreasing attempting to keep remorse at bay
whatever you are seeking wont come in the form you expect
your persistence gently breaking down mud walls
planting seeds taking root
creeping through stone walls they’re crumbling all barriers
when you speak to parts of myself so private
so secrete
they’re almost denied existence –
do you have any idea, how exposed you’ve made me?
dodging questions youre reading into me it’s terrifying
open my rib-cage an assault on the protected there’s nothing
hard cover left
my story is not a pleasant one; it is neither sweet nor harmonious,
as real stories are
it has the taste of nonsense and chaos, of madness and dreams-like the lives of all who stop deceiving themselves
im no writer, no dancer, no leader, nothing special
i dream
sometimes i feel that’s the one thing im good at
i live in my dreams maybe that’s what you sense
other people live in dreams, but not in their own
that’s the difference
so we struggle through laughter
you hold my hands above my head and i
melt into some new type of pleasure
no one likes change they didn’t elicit
im learning to be okay
to let go – let you, let life
take control